For the rest of my life. For as long as we both shall live. Forever. With a stranger. He must have felt the same—I saw his knuckles turning white from holding my hands so hard. He was crushing the delicate bones of my fingers, but I didn’t care. It seemed as though we both needed an anchor, something solid to hold onto, some sort of slight connection that might guide us toward a semblance of happiness. He lifted my veil, and kissed my brow so gently I almost didn’t feel it. Quietly, so only I could hear, he whispered, ‘Smile. For now, we both must smile.’ +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Our wedding celebration passed in a sickening blur, far too fast for my liking. I was dreading its end, when I would be handed off into the care of my new husband for our first night together. I knew what I had to do, what was expected of me. I laughed into my goblet at the thought of my mother’s kind advice: ‘Lie back and think of England.’ Yes, Eleanor. Think of all the strong sons you’ll. Kaiser flattened his hand against my back and started to rub gently up and down my back before tightening his grip on me again. A small ‘yeow – schnickikikk’ came from our feet and I started. Kaiser’s hands pulled away from my sides as we looked down. The Siamese looked irritated. I laughed nervously and looked at Kaiser from under my eyelashes. His mouth twitched and his eyes twinkled. ‘Sounds like it’s time to feed the cats,’ he said, softly. ‘Did you want me to send someone for your things?’ * * * * * It was not until later that night at supper that I asked what he meant by ‘feed the cats’. He smiled and refused to comment, saying that the comment had a lewd connotation that was inappropriate for a lady’s ears. Kaiser pushed his chair back and crossed his ankles in the isle. He started fishing around in his vest and pulled out a pipe and a round tin of tobacco. A small silver-tipped rod and a box of matches were arranged neatly on the table beside him. I watched in fascination.
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